PLASTIC SURGEON

Happy Halloween, everybody!! I can only pray that you're hoarding Reeses Cups in your air passages, suffocating from milk chocolate overkill and choking on your own drool as you crave another Kit-Kat wafer. And in the spirit of the season, you should have already gained as much weight as I have (9 lbs) otherwise you're not properly celebrating the holiday. Or life in general, really. Although I don't have any cool Halloween parties to attend and won't be so privileged to trick or treat in my neighborhood (I live in a high-rise condo!) I did NOT pass up the opportunity to create a novel costume. I'm a sucker for puns but gag at the sight of cliches and store-bought costumes. So, I designed my own ensemble and from very basic materials constructed this Gaga inspired get-up. I'm a plastic surgeon. But... literally. I'm made of plastic!

I fashioned a translucent bubble skirt tutu out of clear bags my mom used to store wrapping paper. The top half is a blouse underneath two more strips of see-through stuffing, held together by ANOTHER plastic bag, twisted into a minimal belt. The cap was simple; I grabbed a few sheets of paper and googled "how to make a nurse's hat from scratch." Fifteen minutes and one red sharpie later... voila! It's not Party City quality, but it photographed well-enough. I might give the impression of being a perfectionist, but secretly, I'm not. I'll take whatever route takes me to the most amount of peanut butter cups in the least amount of time. I think economists call that theory "efficiency." I call it *recites something catty enough to be published on a Cafe Press t-shirt about chocolate and menopause* #antihumor

Lastly, PLEASE vote for me in this DIY Halloween costume competition sponsored by American Apparel and SPOOKBOOK.nu! All you have to do is hype me on Lookbook. I am forever indebted to your generosity. Peace and love to all of your precious souls tonight and remember this... if it ain't Hershey's, it ain't happenin!

Everything is infinite,

Bebe Zeva