I think I'm comfortably postfeminist enough to wear this Girls Gone Wild trucker hat. Surely someone will confuse my accessorization of the franchise as a subversive endorsement of women 'just expressing themselves.' But I'm not that optimistic. I think I'm actually okay with wearing this hat because I think "Girls Gone Wild" is just the type of shitty entertainment that deserves to be appropriated into contextless ubiquity, hopefully destroying the fecal aura of its crass origin en route. Lol I'm a little out of control today guys.
No disrespect to the actual girls 'gone wild' (or girls going wild anywhere, I guess) -- whatever your reason for participation, I empathize. My core issue with this franchise is its slimy ideological veneer - the one that tricks people into believing women can make truly independent decisions in a culture so entrenched in discrete patriarchal influence.
That said, I can't be counted on to not appropriate meaningful things because (remember?) I selfishly enjoy holding culture accountable for its terrible entitlement complexes. And I've been known to imitate the masses in an undisclosed, masturbatory situationist charade. The difference between my participation in trends that I know suck deep down and the participation of most genuine 'mainstream apologists' is that
1) I don't sincerely believe that anything popular is good
2) I don't currently appraise the importance of my behavior at an obese overestimate -- one that I've seen lead many unfortunate internet presences to defend their lazy compliance with claims that all life and conversation is "performance art"
and
3) I will admit when something I've said or made is propaganda or pornography (this entire blog and all of my social media accounts)
Conversation over. Oh wait, this was and never will be a conversation because I cannot be persuaded. I'm a petulant 20 year old, people. Lower your expectations.
Vintage cap, Deisel leather jacket, Motel bodysuit from 80s Purple, OMG Fashion disco pants, Missguided heels
Everything is infinite,
Bebe Zeva
Since moving to LA with only ~2 suitcases of clothes to cycle through, I've learned to make practical use of a few pieces that I majorly took for granted back in Vegas. I've had these velvet track pants for over six months, but only started wearing them as frequently as I do now (which is once a week at the very least) in November, when my options were severely limited to what I could fit in luggage. I never really appreciated having such an expansive wardrobe back at home -- I never even wondered what it would be like to have to eventually wear an item of clothing multiple times out of necessity and not ironic fun. Now, having a closet that I can zip neatly into a suitcase means having to get *seriously* creative with unfamiliar limits. Fortunately the sweatshirt is new (c/o OMG Fashion) although I promised myself I wouldn't go into flowery detail about how "luxurious" the quilted fabric feels against my bare skin in wintertime because sadly no one ACTUALLY cares about that shit. Not even me.
A motivational New Years prep talk for myself: I want to be more earnest about my pursuit of a fulfilling life. That means expecting others to be more honest and communicative with me only after I am confident that I can offer them the same respect. You get what you give, and so far I don't feel like I've given as much as I am capable of. I am often selfish and greedy, lazy, fearful, self-sabotaging, and unmotivated. Finally I'm learning to accept that despite these shortcomings, I deserve secure relationships and a rewarding career. I'm not better or worse than anyone, no more or less deserving of intimacy and love. Everyone is equal. And there is no one in this world who should have to look out for their goals while guiding mine because I'm supposedly too special to rule my world myself. I'm an adult now, 20 years old. And with the reluctance of my inner begrudging teenager, I independently have to look out for my well-being without expecting to be 'saved' by others. Only I am responsible for my own happiness, and 100% in charge of the 50% role I play in my pursuit of love.
Happy 2014, enjoy the commemorative 2013 throwback beanie. It's hard to part with the past.
FROM TOP TO BOTTOM:
Beanie - Gift
Clubmaster sunglasses - Zero UV"Quilted Monochrome Jumper" - OMG Fashion
Track pants - Sheinside
Heels - Missguided
Don't forget to follow me on instagram! @BebeZeva
Everything is infinite,
Bebe Zeva
