eye can't see me

June 18th, 2015: no matter how much coffee I drink, I can't get my brain to 'turn on.' It's like the best intellectual work I can do these days is reading, but even that depends on luck and circumstance if my standard anticipates more than just recognizing words on a page without letting them aerate and flourish as sensible concepts. I had a breakdown yesterday while composing my resume -- as if that isn't uncharacteristic enough -- and realized that I haven't written creatively in years. Something happened... my verbal chamber went out of business, no longer accepts new clients, has yet to liquidate its inventory of the words I tend to use over and over again. I need more than a software update to revive my creative machine. I need more than oil to grease the gears. I need to replace this entire computer. But I can't. Because replacing the computer means replacing me, and at that point what good is an upgraded system when the experiences that motivated the upgrade in the first place... are gone? 

My eyes are insubordinate. They pull the blackout curtains down over my pupils. I incentivize them with caffeine, but the differentiating code that makes caffeine caffeine, a stimulant and not just a random molecule, means nothing to my body parts. They are unpersuaded and decline its request to operate. They don't care. They resist chemical protocol.  

How to see when my internal machines govern themselves? The sum no longer has any jurisdiction over the parts...



Styleart camouflage eyes custom muscle tee, Nastydress camouflage print blouse, Romwe sunglasses and boots, Vanessa Mooney chain necklace, Prada backpack, Perry Ellis windbreaker

Everything is infinite,

Bebe

BAROQUETTE

I had this idea about using my daily horoscope to guide my thought process while writing a post that describes my #ootd. I know a lot of my readers don't take astrology seriously, and to be perfectly real... even I'm not sure that I can entirely vest my trust in an unverifiable science. But assigning a cosmic narrative to my day's events makes life 1) more interesting and 2) more organized. Seriously. Think about astrology as a mystical system that compartmentalizes people and then structures their calendars with predictions and guidance. This makes survival SO much easier to process. So, even if it does seem foolish as an objective measurement, at least it does a service to the psyche.

About clothes: not sure what inspired me to pair a "fiercely baroque" sweatshirt with transparent camo pants, but that's what came out of my brain and I obviously didn't fight the urge. Both 'camo print' and 'rococo gold' seem like tried 2012 tropes so correct me for walking around like a bag of chips in 2014 when I'm clearly repping the wrong year and ruining my own reputation. Breaking news: I do actually care what other people think and my self-esteem is severely contingent on whatever those thoughts are.



Romwe collar and necklace, Yes Style baroque sweatshirt, Awwdore camo pants, Missguided heels

Everything is infinite,

Bebe Zeva

CAMO CASUAL

In my mind, this camouflage halter can be worn one of two ways: either as a loose top, over leggings or pants (as it's worn here), or as a some sort of cross between kilt and skirt, held up like suspenders over a top and pants with the rope tied around my neck. I've been brave enough to rock that "avant army" look only once before, but I hope to do it up again with a mesh tee, leatherette pants, and combat boots or sneaker wedges. This time, I got a bit glam with it and wore my suede heels. But a practical army jacket and beanie keep the theme casual overall. 



FROM TOP TO BOTTOM:
Beanie - H&M
"Berlin jacket" - CRASH & BURN
Camo halter - GYPSPY WARRIOR
"High Wait Faux Leather Leggings" - Daily Look
Suede heels - Persunmall


I've had this Crash and Burn "Berlin" jacket for at least a year and it's proved to be one of the most useful pieces of outerwear in my wardrobe, despite always seeming to escape documentation on my blog. I sadly won't be wearing it as much this summer (hello searing 110+ degree temperatures) but I'm glad I got one last outfit in before hanging it back up in the section of my closet titled "don't even THINK about it until November." Other, equally practical pieces: high-waist leatherette leggings. Most underrated garment in ALL of contemporary apparel. Faux leather leggings aren't comfortable unless you're a 90 pound waif with a flat stomach. For the rest of us: the high-waisted version! DailyLook sells them in black, rose, and burgundy for only $30. I wear mine at LEAST twice a week, so the price is justified tenfold. 

Everything is infinite,

Bebe Zeva

FADE TO WILD

All I need in this world is a snapback and free wi-fi. Been spending most of my days at home but every once in a while there's opportunity for adventure... that's when I break out the camo crop top and fill my backpack with cameras and a phone charger. I live in such an insane city. Would be a waste to keep to myself instead of marinating in the estranged neon aura, melodic casino rhythm and almost supernatural fluorescence...



FROM TOP TO BOTTOM:
Studded cap - ROMWE
Studded jacket - BOOHOO
Camo crop top - O-Mighty
Leopard shorts - Choies
UNIF Hellbounds - Solestruck
Backpack - Yes Style

Light clothes, big shoes. That's my summer game. The badass top and equally badass happy face pin are from O-Mighty, vintage and wholesale fashion extraordinaires. You need to check out their site if you like rad shit, which invariably ALL of you do, otherwise why are you even here on this blogspot where all I talk and care about is rad shit?? Yeah. And follow them on Instagram: omweekend ^-^

My leopard shorts are from Choies, an online retailer I've featured here on FTBH before (remember BORN IN THE USA?) Like O-Mighty, they stock such insanely dope product that I couldn't resist but to make a collage out of other must-haves from the site... too good. Hope you lurve. <3

"URBAN LUXE" by Bebe Zeva on Polyvore

Everything is infinite,

Bebe Zeva

TROPICAMO

What you’re seeing right here right now is my Ultimate Look. Pairing watercolor floral print with silver spandex is possibly the greatest sartorial decision I have ever made in my petty career as a fashion blogger. You call it egotism, I call it pride. This is my craft. Tropical patterns, transparent sunglasses, and metallic motifs are my craft. Hot pink Louboutin clutches and cotton slacks are my craft. Matching the soft green of my blazer to the vivid succulents of my landscape is my craft. The aesthetic marriage of lounge, botanica, and modernity is my craft. RESPECT the “craft” – it’s “art” plus two consonants.

FROM TOP TO BOTTOM:

Sunglasses – Vintage

Cuff necklace – OASAP

Turtleneck – Boohoo

Tropical blazer – VIVILLI

Hot pink clutch - Louboutin

Slacks – YES STYLE

Silver sandals – Chicnova

Camo isn’t limited to a green and brown blend of foresty brush tones… everything is technically camo if the relationship between the outfit and context reflects at least marginal similarity. If you’re in a gallery wearing an all-white tuxedo, you’re in camo. If you’re in a parking garage wearing an industrial gray sweatsuit, you’re in camo. If you’re in the snack aisle at Ralph’s wearing a NASCAR jacket sponsored by Nabisco, you’re in camo. I’m in my valet zone wearing “plant print” – I’m in camo. Sweat these silver platform sandals from Chicnova.

Everything is infinite,

Bebe Zeva